And now we talk.

Hello, weary traveller.
Hah, I get such a kick out of saying that. Oohooh...mystical!

So today was as crappy as I had anticipated. Two dumb questions in one day. And today felt way too much like a Friday, which isn't fair to my brain. Oh, how I long for the weekend when I can lay on the couch and play Kingdom Hearts to my content. Oh, and see if Baru and Sarayu are free for Bitchfest 2004. Of course, I have to see when Baru is working *ahemspaceshipahem*.

Something good happened today though. Freddy and Renee looked at my sketch book, and genuinely liked the drawings. Renee said their eyes looked so alive, which made me really happy. I think most people are so sick of my drawings that when they see them, they don't see the specialness of them or the pieces of my soul that I put into them. So that was nice. All I want to do with my life is turn this ugly horrible place we all live in into something a little more beautiful, no matter the consequences. I drew a picture in the back of my social text, of three elves, and I don't care if I get in trouble. It's better than the stupid things scribbled on the rest of it like "Suck cock muthah fuckers" and other such words. I don't care.

And now I am full of rage.

If I could kill you all, I would.

I suppose you can guess what kind of mood I'm in from my title. Murderous. The day has only begun, and I'm going to be late (I couldn't give a toss) but at least I can go back to bed for a little while. I'm going for a nap now, I'll have more bitchiness for you later. Lucky you!
Oh, and by the way, if you are feeling upset, do NOT eat Goldfish crackers. They will come back to haunt you.

Ugh, please let me die.

Today was mostly terrible. The weather is absolutely bleak, and I can't stand the last, bitter snowfall of every year. It makes getting out of my warm cozy bed even harder.
Okay, so I was having a nap in the Pit on my spare, and for some reason, as I drifted of into the nether regions of reality-ooh, poetic-something came into my head.
"Lizzie Borden took an axe
Gave her mother fourty whacks
When she saw what she had done
She gave her father fourty-one."
I don't know why I suddenly thought of that old rhyme, but if I had an axe, I know exactly who I would butcher. Many people. I'd hack them to pieces, and I would make their deaths slow and agonizing. Just because I could.
Aaaanyway, moving right along, the rest of the day was pathetically boring and stupid. I was going to go to my dad's but I don't think I could have handled my mother-of-step's bitchiness so I faked sick and went home. Sitting on the noisy bus surrounded by fellow students who were loud and arrogant. I gripped the locket attached to my cell phone and thought of those seven little words that make everything go numb, thinking bitterly to myself. I bet they think I'm naive. They think I don't know anything. Well they're wrong and other such random angry mutturings. I opened my bag and pulled out Tinstal my toy cat, or Tinny, for short, and he made me feel better. He's really soft and looks funny.
Then when I finally got home I had to track through the mud and the snow, kicking lamposts to vent my rage-I hate walking through the mud-and then I sneaked between the neighbours houses. I wasn't paying attention to the ground and stepped my left foot in a puddle that went right to my ankle. I was only a few paces away from my house, but my shoes aren't waterproof and I one icky cold wet dirty sock squelching all the way to my door. Today is not my day. And people are always using the theatre, so I can't even go to the Happy Hidey Hole.
Although, Danielle did tell me something that raised my spirits. It made us both feel good. I suppose I shouldn't underestimate myself as an actor.

Spring Break endeth. Now let us chronicle the days events.

School was pretty ugh. I crashed into a table whilst spinning around to show off my pretty skirt. Anyway, later that evening, I recieved a phone call from Baru.
"Hi Kachie. I want to do something."
"Okay, when?"
"Today."
"Uh...sure."
This was followed by Dairy Queen and a rented movie. It was great. And always remember: Was practising fire safety when I died.

Official Spring Break: Day Ten

Passover is over! Hah! Try and smite me now, God! *eats a cookie*
So yesterday I was at my dad's, and we went to Dairy Queen for an Easter Sunday icecream. It was really fun. My dad is a funny man, and makes me laugh till my stomach hurts. We sat at the table, me hungrily wolfing down my Peanut Buster Parfait, my dad telling hilarious jokes, and my sister eating a Blizzard and wiping ice cream of my dad's chin. I swear, we could have been filmed for one of those "happy feeling" commercials.
I was kinda pissed though. It was around 7 'o clock, and there was a man complaining about his burgers, which obviously had been made incorrectly. The lady who served us, an incredibly polite and hard-working teenage girl, was also helping him. She took his order again and went back to the kitchen to fix it. She was probably going as fast as she could, and still this asshole guy was ragging on about how long it was taking. "Fuck, I'm an idiot, why did I let her take my fucking burgers?" he said, and quite loudly too. When the girl returned, she was most appologetic, and asked if he needed anything else. He said "Yeah, I'm fine, now piss off." The girl sort of winced and walked stiffly away. I wanted to get up and dump my ice cream on his head and say "Listen, pal, this fine young lady has probably had to deal with assholes like you all day, and on Easter Sunday. Why don't you go home and make your own fucking burgers if you're so damn picky?" I really wanted to, but A) he was bigger than me and probably would have punched me into next week, and B) that would have been a waste of perfectly good ice cream. So I sincerely hope he gets food poisoning.
Oh my God...school tomorrow. That sounds so weird. I should probably go and get all my stuff ready, not to mention do all that homework I conveniently forgot about. Hehehe...damn it.

Grrrr! Baru! I called you but you were "at work". More like "zooming through the glaxy in an uber cool spaceship"! Don't think I don't know. Anyway, email me or something, because I need to get Bitchfest 2004 organized. Yes, you read correctly. Bitchfest. As in you, me, and Sarah Estrin if she can make it. And next time, maybe you should be considerate and invite me to the spaceship as well. Meanie.

It is...12:41 am. Spring Break officially ended 41 minutes ago, but I'm clinging to it. Yeah, it was lame, but at least I got tonnes of sleep. And sleep is always good. So I should go and do my homework and get all of my stuff ready for tomorrow, but damn, solitaire is addictive.
So I think tomorrow is definitely going to be a "Hidey Hole" kinda day. Stupid stupidness. Crap, I hope I didn't have any social homework. If I did, I am screwed. My mark absolutely plummeted. Getting an A+ is easy. Maintaining it is down right hard. I am growing more and more indifferent to my mark and less and less tolerant of the people around me. But I shall have to see what happens. I'll probably start in a good mood, and get more snappy and bitchy towards the end of the day. As per usual.

My, my. What total assholes some people can be.

Official Spring Break: Day Nine

Happy Easter everyone. I almost forgot about it. I miss being a little girl, and looking forward to the Easter Rabbit coming to my house and leaving a basket of goodies and a stuffed animal of some description. Once, he left $20.00, which is a fortune when you are 7-and-a-half years old. You can buy Polly Pockets, or even a Barbie doll! Man...being a kid was so magical with all of the wonders of money and toys. I think I have to go and hug a teddy bear. Hehe...Sour Kraut Sheep!

I wish there was a way I could get my hair to stay put all night. When it is down, and I'm trying to sleep on my pillow, it just itches my face and neck, so I usually wear a bandana or tie it back somehow. Last night I painstakingly tied it into a bun, hoping it would stay neatly knotted most of the night. I guess I moved around a lot in my sleep last night, because I woke up looking like Cousin It from the Addams Family movies. Then it was all tangled and messy, which I hate. But now it is bunned again, tight, not a hair out of place. Stupid unruly hair.

Moving on to other news, I had the weirdest dream last night. First day of grade 12, and I was crying for some reason. Probably because all the previous grade twelves were gone. I was standing in the front doorway of the school, and walked to the gate. For some reason, the school was on a beautiful green hillside with flowers and a brilliant blue summer sky, and rolling hills and mountains in the distance. I turned adn saw all of my aquaintances, including the old grade twelves, standing in the little foyez thingy, with the double doors wide open. Some were waving, and others were just glaring at me from the back. I can't really remember who was doing what, but the ones who were waving looked a little sad, as if they were waving goodbye to me. I thought it was I who was leaving, but then the WEIRDEST thing ever happened. Everyone ran at me, some as if they were going to hug me, others in a murderous rage, but before they came within a foot of me, they leapt into the sky and turned into DRAGONS! How weird is that? The "nice" ones turned either blue or green, and the "mean" ones turned red or black. I spun and watched them fly off into the sky, heading for the distant mountains I mentioned earlier. I wanted to go with them, but I couldn't change, and just stood there stupidly, reaching out to them. I let my arm fall, sank to my knees, and I began to cry even harder, feeling more alone than I ever remember feeling in a dream. It was the oddest thing. Hah...sorry, I know talking about dreams is totally lame, but I feel nerdy, thanks to the Holy Sweatervest.